Thursday, April 4, 2019

Weezer Rankdown (due june 24th)

Hello there, you heard right. Mr Weezer is doing a Weezer rankdown. Weezer is a well known pop-rock band formed in the early 1990s by God (Rivers Cuomo), My co-worker at the office who said Weezer was lame (Matt Sharp), Patrick Wilson, and Brian Bell. After awhile, My co-worker at the office who said Weezer was lame left Weezer cold, bitter and alone. And they did not want to be old men anymore and even after my co-worker at the office who said Weezer was lame left, they released more music this time with Scott Shriner replacing him on bass. With Scott Shriner they went back to the good life. It was time they got back, it was time they got back, and they didn't know how they fell off the track, they wanted to go back yeahhhhhhhh.

For this rankdown, I compiled two singles from each album they have released, any songs I felt like were standouts or exceptionally special to God, and I also took two songs off of the rock opera they abandoned before working on Pinkerton (Songs From The Black Hole). The songs I chose are in my opinion the best songs on SFTBH.

Anyways, here are the songs you will be ranking if you want to do this:

Undone (The Sweater Song)
Buddy Holly
Say It Ain't So
I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams
Longtime Sunshine
El Scorcho
The Good Life
Pink Triangle
Hash Pipe
Island In The Sun
Dope Nose
Keep Fishin
Beverly Hills
Perfect Situation
Pork And Beans
Troublemaker
(If You're Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To
I'm Your Daddy
Can't Stop Partying (ft. Lil Wayne)
Memories
Hang On
Back To The Shack
Da Vinci
Thank God For Girls
King Of The World
Feels Like Summer
Happy Hour
Africa
Take On Me
Can't Knock The Hustle
High As A Kite


Send your lists here

now due june 24th to celebrate the 25th anniversary of Weezer's debut single, "Undone - The Sweater Song"

Spotify Playlist

Sunday, March 3, 2019

Why Sex is Not Allowed: An Essay

Mr. Weezer

Mr. Weezer's Chart Examination

February 24, 2019       





        Hello, welcome to the Mr. Weezer blog. Today I am going to talk about how sex is prohibited 

by the government and why it is that way. I feel like this is very important information. Especially 

considering the fact that PornHub, the largest source of pornography online has now reached an 

Alexa rating of 27. (For those who don't know, the Alexa rating is an index hosted by Amazon 

that determines how many visitors websites have yearly.) Additionally, music has become 

increasingly sexualized in recent years to great commercial success (look at the lyrics to any Nicki 

Minaj song for proof). 

         What's the problem with the normalization of sex? Well, sex is the manifestation of everything 

wrong with humanity. To begin, sex brings diseases such as HIV or chlamydia (which can chop that 

skin flute right off, explaining why Brendon Urine lacks a penis.) As well, these sexually transmitted 

diseases could potentially result in death. Notable famous people who have these sexually transmitted

diseases include Usher, Brendon Urie (previously stated to be evident by the lack of a penis), and 

Magic Johnson. These diseases could also result in genitalia being distorted whether or not it is the

penis looking like that of a horse (which is not as fun as it sounds) or the vagina being a swollen red

instead of the usual pastel pink hue. In fact, these diseases have become so widespread that it is to the

point that more than half of the world has at least one (with the most common being herpes). The 

reason sex is banned is that way these diseases could be eradicated over time, providing a purer 

humanity.

         As well, sex has brought nothing to humanity except for pain and suffering. Case in point is 

Weezer's album "Pinkerton" which is a perfect insight into the life of God himself (Rivers Cuomo) 

and his struggle with sex. Throughout the album, he makes an point for why he has banned sex and 

each track provides more and more emotion to it than the last. By the end, I was completely 

convinced on why sex is banned. Rivers' pain is evident throughout the whole album. He is truly

presenting his heart and soul to the whole world and to prevent his pain and suffering, sex is banned.

For instance, some examples where is pain is evident is on "Tired Of Sex" where he complains about 

his struggle to find and attract a sexual partner so he can have sex. Something emphasized by his 

screams for help in the post-chorus. Or the fiery "El Scorcho" where Cuomo hisses out against those 

"half japanese girls" for denying him of a relationship which is prevalent in his actions in the song

such as looking through the girl's diary after saying that she's never heard of "Green Day" (a popular 

rock band at the time of the song's release). Finally, on "Pink Triangle" Cuomo details a story of 

where the person he liked was actually a lesbian and how he felt. He expresses his pain and to 

prevent this pain in the future, Cuomo banned sex himself. However, Cuomo not only did this for his

own personal benefit. He also wanted to help people live purer lives and lift a burden off of other

people who were sexually frustrated.

            The final reason for why Rivers Cuomo banned sex is because of massacres that occurred

because of peoples' sexual frustrations. Throughout history, sex has only brought frustration and 

anger to this world to the point where people would kill each other to get closer to having sex.

This is because sex is a human instinct and our goal on this planet is to reproduce. People would

do anything to fulfill this need, as this is what they were designed for including the killing of other

people. Since sex is able to kill people, it can be concluded that Cuomo's ban on sex is live-saving.

         Therefore, as a conclusion, sex is a burden on society and by removing it, Rivers Cuomo (aka 

God) was able to save this world from disease, pain, anger, and death. Cuomo's ban on sex 

singlehandedly will eradicate sexually transmitted diseases such as Herpes and HIV in the future, has 

stopped the pain and anger sexually frustrated people faced, and has saved lives because of this anger.








Saturday, February 23, 2019

album review: weezer (teal album)

teal is a disgusting color.

but weezer turn it make it a nice color to look at.

the cover of africa, as i have said in the past is heaven. same applies for the rest of these covers. i love how weezer is branching out their sound with them.

weezer cum


weezer cum


weezer cum


weezer cum


cum weezer


weemen

weezer semen

fuck
fuck
fuck
fuck
fuck
fuck


Friday, December 21, 2018

topp 10 best songs of 2018

heyyyyyyyyyyyy i'm misterw eezer and i am here to countdown the top tennnnnnnnnnnnnn best hit songs of 2018 ;0)))))000)))))()(())))))))


first off we have a cery good song ;33333333333333

10. [Verse 1: Rivers Cuomo]


What's with these homies dissin' my girl?
Why do they gotta front?
What did we ever do to these guys
That made them so violent?

9. [Pre-Chorus : Matt Sharp, Rivers Cuomo]

Woo-hoo, but you know I'm yours
Woo-hoo, and I know you're mine
Woo-hoo, and that's for all time

8. [Chorus: Cuomo]

Woo-ee-ooh, I look just like Buddy Holly
Oh-oh, and you're Mary Tyler Moore
I don't care what they say about us anyway
I don't care 'bout that

7. [Verse 2: Cuomo]

Don't you ever fear, I'm always near
I know that you need help
Your tongue is twisted, your eyes are slit
You need a guardian

6. [Pre-Chorus: Sharp, Cuomo]

Woo-hoo, and you know I'm yours
Woo-hoo, and I know you're mine
Woo-hoo, and that's for all time

5. [Chorus: Cuomo]

Woo-ee-ooh, I look just like Buddy Holly
Oh-oh, and you're Mary Tyler Moore
I don't care what they say about us anyway
I don't care 'bout that
I don't care 'bout that


anyways,,, this next one is a long one just like weezer's 80 inch penis
6. [Bridge: Cuomo and Sharp]

Bang! Bang!
Knock on the door
Another big bang, get down on the floor
Oh no! What do we do?
Don't look now but I lost my shoe
I can't run and I can't kick
What's a matter, babe, are you feelin' sick?
What's a matter, what's a matter, what's a matter you?
What's a matter, babe, are you feelin' blue? Oh-oh!
(And that's for all time
And that's for all time)

5. [Chorus: Cuomo]

Woo-ee-oo, I look just like Buddy Holly
Oh-oh, and you're Mary Tyler Moore
I don't care what they say about us anyway
I don't care 'bout that
I don't care 'bout that
I don't care 'bout that
I don't care 'bout that

5. [Intro]

Oh yeah
Alright

4. [Verse 1]

Somebody's Heine'
Is crowding my icebox
Somebody's cold one
Is giving me chills
Guess I'll just close my eyes

3. [Interlude]

Oh yeah, alright
Feels good, inside

2. [Verse 2]

Flip on the telly
Wrestle with Jimmy
Something is bubbling
Behind my back
The bottle is ready to blow

now time for our diswhorenebale mentions ;)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

DHM 1: [Chorus]
Say it ain't so
Your drug is a heartbreaker
Say it ain't so
My love is a life taker

DHM 2: [Verse 3]
I can't confront you
I never could do that which might hurt you
So try and be cool
When I say
"This way is a water slide away from me
That takes you further every day"
So be cool

DHM 3: [Chorus]
Say it ain't so
Your drug is a heartbreaker
Say it ain't so
My love is a life taker

DHM 4: [Bridge]
Dear Daddy, I write you
In spite of years of silence
You've cleaned up, found Jesus
Things are good, or so I hear
This bottle of Stephen's
Awakens ancient feelings
Like father, stepfather
The son is drowning in the flood
Yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah

DHM 5: [Guitar Solo]


and now for my #1

my #1 is so touching just like weezer's pe pee
my #1 is good
My @1 is amazing
I am my $1

1. [Chorus]

Say it ain't so
Your drug is a heartbreaker
Say it ain't so
My love is a life taker

Weezer Rankdown (due june 24th)

Hello there, you heard right. Mr Weezer is doing a Weezer rankdown. Weezer is a well known pop-rock band formed in the early 1990s by God (R...